So early in the mornning here, but here I am my thumb killing me for some unknown reason and yet I want to go in and don't want to because it costs money as everything else does. Now to me I dispise money as I see its like a drug it makes ppl NEED it just like a drug makes it so the addict NEEDS it. Wars are fought over money just like they are over drugs and money breaks up homes just like drugs does. Families get torn apart over money as well as drugs tear up families. So many similarties makes me wonder if ppl have really put much thought into it it before. My view on it I know is an extreme measure perhaps, but that is me always thinking outside the box. Ugh, its going to be a long week at work looks like I'm working 6 days streight this week and have one day off then get my 3 days off for the lil trip we will be going on down I belive South of Salem. I need the break but after moving and well still in the process of moving as anymore on my days off I hop on the bus go to the old place grab all that I can possibly carry and hop back on the bus and walk up the some 50 stairs to set it all down at last. Not the easiest way to move, but not being able to have anyone really to help I gotta do it the only possible way I can. Something that has occured to me as with carrying so much ppl at first asked me and the lil one if we were running away. I guess in a way we are running away from some of the problems the other place and hopfully things will be better for us in the new place. I want to feel a lil happy but I'm scare dto as every time I try to be happy or excited about anything it all goes back down hill. I've come to realize these past few months that I basicly have lived in hell for the past 26-27 years basicly after we moved from MI to OR. If I didn't get it at home I got it in school and yet ppl question why I am how I am. If you'd ben through all I've gone through I'm sure you'd come out with some side effects or scars at the very least. I had better go try to get a lil more sleep and hope my daughters father gets to the camp to pick her up and drop her off here at hoome and that my mom gets here in time to watch her as well. He better do this one thing as he's let her down so much already. Ok off to sleep I shall try to go now.
